Uncover the Hidden Gem of Fes: DAR AIN ALLO's Moroccan Magic
Okay, Buckle Up Buttercups: A Thoroughly Unsanitized Review of [Hotel Name Placeholder - Let's Pretend It's called "The Cloud Nine Dream"]
Right, so, "The Cloud Nine Dream." That's what they're calling it, eh? Sounds like a fever dream, and frankly, after my stay, parts of it felt like one. Let's dive in, shall we? Prepare for a bumpy ride, because this review is less GPS and more a chaotic, heartfelt, and probably slightly inaccurate map of my recent hotel experience.
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Accessibility: The Pre-Show & The Show's Grand Finale
Okay, so I'm always keen to see how a hotel handles accessibility. I'm not in a wheelchair, but I'm a big believer in "if they haven't thought of that, what else haven't they thought of?" Good news - kinda good news. The bones of accessibility were there. The elevators? Check. The ramps? Check. The promise of wheelchair-accessible rooms? Double-check. Now, the execution… let's just say it varied. One minute, the staff were saints, going above and beyond to assist. The next, I was wrestling with a door that looked accessible on paper but, in reality, needed a contortionist and a magic wand to actually open. It's like they’re trying folks, keep it up, but maybe re-evaluate some dimensions.
On-site Accessible Restaurants/Lounges: Saw them. Theoretically. Whether they actually were fully accessible, well, let's just say I didn't spend hours meticulously measuring every table height. Let's move swiftly on.
Internet: Bless the Wi-Fi Gods (…and the LAN Satan)
Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! Hallelujah! Mostly. It worked, blessedly. The connection was… consistent. Though, I'm not ashamed to admit, the thought of the LAN cable lying in wait gave me a shudder (I’m a digital dinosaur, I’ll be honest.) This is especially important for a travel blogger like myself. Every second spent not uploading pics of my breakfast buffet is a wasted opportunity!
As for overall internet services, It’s a gamble, I’m afraid. Sometimes you're streaming Netflix, other times you're staring at a buffering icon like you're looking into the abyss.
Things to Do & Ways to Relax: The Spa Shenanigans
Okay, the spa. THIS is where "Cloud Nine" comes closest to living up to its name.
Body Scrub, Body Wrap, Massage, Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Foot bath: YES, YES, YES, YES, (a giant enthusiastic YES) YES, YES! My kind of heaven. I may or may not have spent a solid afternoon getting pummeled into a state of blissful submission (okay, I definitely did). The massage therapist, bless her hands, was a miracle worker. The steam room? Pure, pore-opening bliss.
Pool with view, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor]: Yep, they had 'em. Stunning, actually. Just watching the sunset from the pool was an experience. Okay, a quick anecdote: I tried to do a graceful dive… and basically belly-flopped. But hey, the view was worth the temporary humiliation.
Fitness center, Gym/fitness: Now, I'm not one for the gym (more of a "walk to the buffet" kind of gal), but it looked well-equipped. Shiny machines. People running on treadmills that looked as confused as I felt (as they always do). Still impressive
Cleanliness and Safety: The Disinfecting Dance
Look, in this post-covid world, cleanliness is king (or queen, as I prefer). And Cloud Nine tried. I saw:
- Anti-viral cleaning products: Good. Very good.
- Daily disinfection in common areas: Check.
- Hand sanitizer: EVERYWHERE. (My germaphobe tendencies were delighted!
- Room sanitization opt-out available: Respect.
- Rooms sanitized between stays: Another check.
- Staff trained in safety protocol: Seemed like it. Masks, sanitizing, the whole shebang.
- Sterilizing equipment: Hmm, I didn't see any of the big UV ray machines but I take their word for it.
And, most importantly…
- Physical distancing of at least 1 meter: This was a big one, and they mostly pulled it off, unless you were at the buffet during peak hours (more on that later).
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: This Buffet's Going to Drive Me Nuts
Ah, the food. The lifeblood of any good hotel experience! Some hits, some misses, some… outright culinary adventures.
A la carte in restaurant, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Bar, Bottle of water, Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, Happy hour, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Restaurants, Room service [24-hour], Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant: Okay, so they had everything. Everything and the kitchen sink. I took advantage of the 24-hour room service more times than I'd like to admit. That said, the buffet…
Oh, the buffet. A glorious, chaotic, carb-laden symphony. The breakfast, a smorgasbord of international delights was magnificent, you could probably get a full meal at 3 am.
HOWEVER, here's where things got a little… dicey. Picture this: a sea of hungry faces, a stampede towards the bacon, and a near-riot over the last croissant. Okay, perhaps I'm exaggerating. But the sheer volume of humanity competing for the same scrambled eggs was a sight to behold. And some of the food… let’s just say consistency wasn't always its strong suit.
Breakfast in room, Breakfast takeaway service, Alternative meal arrangement, Safe dining setup, Individually-wrapped food options, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items: I love all of these, and they came in handy.
Services and Conveniences: The Little Things That Matter
- Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center Lots of good stuff. The concierge was a lifesaver, sorting out a last-minute sightseeing tour. The daily housekeeping was a godsend with my chaotic routine.
For the Kids: Did They Have A Play Area?
- Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal: I'm not a parent, but I did spot a dedicated kids' pool and a play area. So, yes, seems pretty kid-friendly. This is great!
Access, Security, and Getting Around: Safe and Sound (Mostly)
- CCTV in common areas, CCTV outside property, Check-in/out [express], Check-in/out [private], Couple's room, Exterior corridor, Fire extinguisher, Front desk [24-hour], Hotel chain, Non-smoking rooms, Proposal spot, Room decorations, Safety/security feature, Security [24-hour], Smoke alarms, Soundproof rooms: The security felt good. Cameras everywhere. Staff on patrol. All good things. The express check-in was great, and the soundproof rooms mostly lived up to their promise (…except for the neighboring guest's late-night karaoke session. Apparently, Hotel karaoke is a thing.)
- Getting around: Airport transfer, Bicycle parking, Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Car power charging station, Taxi service, Valet parking: Easy peasy lemon squeezy. Transportation was a breeze.
Available in all rooms: The Details that Matter
- **Additional toilet, Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature
Okay, buckle up, buttercup, because we’re about to dive headfirst into the chaotic beauty that is my "Dar Ain Allo, Fes, Morocco: Existential Crisis, Tagines, and Regret (Probably)" itinerary. This isn't some pristine, Instagram-filtered travelogue. This is me, unfiltered, in a Moroccan bazaar of emotions. Prepare for a bumpy ride.
Day 1: Arrival and the Glorious, Terrifying Chaos of the Medina
- Morning (8:00 AM - whenever I actually wake up, Jet Lag is a B-word): Fly into Fes-Saïss Airport (FEZ). *This is it, I thought, as the plane landed. Morocco! Should I have packed more sunscreen? Did I remember my phrasebook? Did I actually *want* to be here?* The airport, while functional, is about as confusing as my dating life. Find a pre-arranged taxi (I'm too scared to flag one down on the fly yet). Negotiating is key – remember that, future self.
- Late Morning (10:00 AM - after I conquer the taxi driver): Arrive at Dar Ain Allo. Holy. Mother. Of. Moorish… decor. The riad (a traditional Moroccan house with an interior courtyard) is… chef's kiss. Gorgeous tiles! A babbling fountain (that, let's be honest, probably breeds mosquitoes). A rooftop terrace promising breathtaking views (and potential sunburn). The staff, thankfully, is super friendly and speaks fluent English. I tip them far too much, mostly because I'm still disoriented.
- Afternoon (12:00 PM - I'm hungry, like, hangry): Dive headfirst into the Fes el Bali Medina. Okay, here we go. Let's do this. I get lost almost immediately. The labyrinthine alleyways are a sensory overload. Donkeys! Motorbikes! The smell of roasting spices! Men trying to sell me… well, everything. I initially freeze up, panic bubbling in my chest. I can't do this. I'm going to die, lost and alone, in a souk, surrounded by angry vendors. But then! I see a little shop selling freshly squeezed orange juice. Crisis averted.
- Afternoon Continues (2:00 PM): Lunch at a local place. I point at something I'm pretty sure is chicken tagine. Praying it's not a mislabeled goat. It's glorious. Absolutely, unbelievably delicious. I devour it in about three minutes, nearly choking on a bone in my eagerness. I need to learn some basic Arabic really badly, like yesterday.
- Late Afternoon (4:00 PM - the bargaining begins): Souk shopping. *This is where I fail miserably. I mean, I *try* to bargain, but end up overpaying for a (admittedly beautiful) leather pouf.* I'm pretty sure the shopkeeper saw me coming a mile away. Note to self: Practice your poker face. Or at least learn the word "no" in Arabic. I buy a cheap scarf too. Feeling both ripped off and strangely satisfied.
- Evening (6:00 PM - maybe a little too touristy, but whatever): Dinner on a rooftop overlooking the Medina at sunset. The view is breathtaking. Seriously, I almost cried. The food, however, is… well, okay. The waiter is charming, though (probably because he knows I'm an easy target for his sales pitch). Back to the riad for a much-needed shower and to dissect my feelings. I had that weird, slightly unsettling feeling of being observed all day. I'm pretty sure I'd need more than a week to understand all the intricacies.
Day 2: Crafts and the Call of the Tannery (and Regret)
- Morning (9:00 AM - after a surprisingly good sleep): Visit the Chouara Tannery. Oh. My. God. The smell hits you like a punch to the face before you even see it. Is this pure hell, or just really intense work? It's everything you've read about. The open vats of dye. The workers wading through the colorful concoctions. The sheer stench of it all. I try to hold my breath, but it’s futile. I end up buying a mint sprig from a vendor which ends up being a godsend. The leather goods are stunning. I buy a leather belt there. This trip is going to break my bank.
- Late Morning (11:00 AM): Explore a pottery workshop. *The craftsmanship is incredible. How do they *do* that?*. Watch the artists at work. Buy a ceramic tagine pot (because, of course). I think I'm genuinely more impressed here.
- Afternoon (1:00 PM): Cooking class! I'm sure I'll be the next MasterChef. I learn to make tagine (chicken, again, because I'm predictable), and mint tea. My first attempt at the tea is a disaster (too much sugar, not enough mint). My second is still pretty bad. But the tagine? Glorious! I even impress myself.
- Late Afternoon (4:00 PM): The Mellah (Jewish Quarter). The history is immense, palpable. I visit the Ibn Danan Synagogue. A moment of reflection, amidst the chaos.
- Evening (7:00 PM - a little too much mint tea, perhaps?): Dinner and a walk through the illuminated Medina. Everything looks different at night. More mystical, more alluring, more… potentially dangerous? I feel a bit more comfortable now. I navigate with (slightly) more confidence. I even strike up a conversation with a local vendor selling spices. He's lovely. And surprisingly insightful, helping me understand a little about the complexities of this place.
- Night (9:00 PM - the existential crisis hits): Back at the riad. Staring at the stars. I felt a sudden, sharp pang of loneliness. The world is huge, and I feel very, very small. Write in my journal. Maybe order another glass of mint tea. Decide to book a Hammam for tomorrow. Self-care, the ultimate cliché.
Day 3: Hammam, a Slight Panic, and the Farewell (For Now)
- Morning (10:00 AM - finally, self-care!): Hammam experience. This is… intimate. Very, very intimate. I am naked, being scrubbed raw by a woman I’ve just met. I don’t understand anything she's saying, but I trust her. It's weirdly… cleansing. I emerge feeling like a new person (and smelling faintly of roses).
- Late Morning (12:00 PM): A visit to the Al Attarine Madrasa (a beautiful Islamic school). *The architecture is exquisite. Absolutely stunning. I can't believe people actually *lived* in these rooms.* A quiet, reflective moment.
- Afternoon (2:00 PM): Attempt a hike to the Merenid Tombs (to see the panoramic view of the Medina). I get lost. Again. And realize I massively underestimated the heat. I drink all my water. I start to get super claustrophobic. I can't breathe! I need to get out. I have a minor panic attack. I'm rescued by a kind local, who gives me water and helps me orient myself. Note to self: Pack more water. And maybe take a map.
- Late Afternoon (4:00 PM): Pack. Feel a pang of melancholy already.
- Evening (6:00 PM): Farewell dinner at the riad. The staff are lovely. The food is delicious. I feel a sense of gratitude. Reflect on the trip. I've laughed, I've cried (mostly from the tannins), I've gotten lost, and I've felt utterly overwhelmed. And I've loved almost every second of it.
- Night (8:00 PM - Before I actually leave which is in the early AM): One last walk through the eerily lit medina to say goodbye. *I feel like I’m seeing it with new eyes. I know where to go now. *I know how to bargain. I almost feel like a local. Have a deep, philosophical conversation with a stray cat. He’s not the best listener, but he doesn’t judge.
Day 4: Departure (But Will I Ever Really Leave?)
- Early Morning (5:00 AM): Taxi to the airport. Goodbye, Fes. Until the next time - and there will be a next time, I just know it.
- Mid-Morning: Flight home. Already planning my return.
In Conclusion:
This itinerary might not be perfect. It's messy. It's filled with my own neurotic quirks. But it’s real. It’s honest. And maybe, just maybe, it captures a little bit of the magic of Fes. The city – and the trip – wasn't always easy. But it was certainly worth it. Did I find myself? Maybe
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